Man, I don’t like when things smack me square between the eyes. Most of you know I am slightly OCD. I HATE when people are late, I HATE when I’m late. I HATE crumbs on my kitchen floor. I HATE when my house is a mess. I HATE when RJ pulls out ten trillion toys and dispurses them all over the living room. I feel so OUT OF CONTROL during these times.

I read an article entitled “This Beautiful Mess” which really reminded me about putting things in perspective. I have two boys. What do you think that’s going to mean in a few years? Yep, you got it. Mud on the kitchen floor, dirty shoes tromping through the house, the toilet seat up with who knows what on and around it, balls, bats, bugs from outside, dirty underwear, socks, and clothes in piles.

In the article I read a mom experiences the same thing I do - utter panic when her Pottery Barn-esque house is destroyed by her son who takes all the couch blankets and pillow and builds a fort. So upset her house was messed up before guests arrive - until her son utters the words “It’s like you care more about the couch than me.” The writer goes on to talk about the lines from the Steven Curtis Chapman song “Signs of Life:”

I’ve got crayons rolling around in the floorboard of my car,
Bicycles all over my driveweay, bats and balls all over my yard,
And there’s a plastic man from outer space sitting in my chair,
The signs of life are everywhere

Eeks, that hurt. Okay, yeah I scored off the charts at the online “See if you are OCD” quiz, but what am I doing to my kids? One motivational writer says she knows her stuff will break sooner or later, so she just looks at it and thinks, “It’s already broken.”

Simple truth learned: Our homes weren’t built to be a showroom…but a place where loving a spouse and children, having babies, teaching children to know and love God is much more important.

So bring on the crayon covered walls (cringe) and chocolate covered faces on white couches…. after all they’re only little once.

Article noted was “This Beautiful Mess” by Candice Watters in the November 2007 Focus on the Family magazine

While perusing a magazine, I found a religious joke that goes like this:

When a pastor visited a small congregation, two local pastors treated him to an afternoon of fishing. After they were in the boat for about a half-hour, the first pastor said, “I forgot my favorite lure in the truck. I’ll be right back.” He jumped out and walked on the water on the shore. He retrieved his lure, and calmly walked on the water back to the boat. The visiting pastor was amazed!

A little while later, the second pastor said he needed to contact his office, but his cell phone was in the truck. He, too, jumped out of the boat, walked on the water to the shore, made his call and returned the same way.

At this point, the visiting pastor thought he should demonstrate the same kind of faith, so he jumped out of the boat but immediately sank.

The pastors looked at each other and said, “Should we tell him where the stumps are?”

Yeah, yeah I laughed too. Then I thought to myself, “Gee, that poor pastor! He thought those other two were something and really messed up trying to do the same thing.” Then I had a BONG! moment (you know like something goes ding in your head but it seemed a lot more evident - hence the BONG!) Oh my gosh….this joke is the literal truth!!!  So many times those of us who are leaders or are in ministry see other people “walking on water” and think, “If I could only be successful like them!” If the truth be known there are things going on underneath that you probably don’t see…which are so simple all we would have needed was an explanation.

I wonder why the pastors didn’t allude to the fact they were just walking on stumps. Were they trying to put an image out there that made people gasp in awe? Were they not willing to share their secrets? How many times have pastors, leaders, or anyone for that matter look like they have got it going….and it’s all a big secret?

Maybe I’m crazy for reading into this a little more than I should….but I think we should all be reminded to be transparent….admit that we are not perfect, we may have had a little help…and pass along the good information to help someone else before they sink in their ministry.

Below is an interview with Russ who is a Buddhist. I asked some frank questions and asked for some honest answers. I think he did a great job, and his thoughts were really thought-provoking for me. Read below:

Hi Russ:Thanks for deciding to answer some questions for me to post on my Time 2 Talk About It Blog. I’m sure everyone will be interested to hear your thoughts, especially about Christianity. Please be honest, and tell us exactly how you feel. Basically what sparked this interview was I noticed on your blog you mentioned that as a child Christianity was shoved down your throat. I’m interested, as well as probably my target readers, as to why that is. I hope you don’t mind such personal questions, but I think it’s important that those of us in the Christian faith understand your feelings - from a different perspective.

Questions

Jen: Russ, why don’t you tell everyone a little bit about yourself (like where you are from, etc) For instance, I noticed on your blog you seem to be into llamas. What’s the interesting thing about that? Are there any other hobbies you are into?

Russ: I was born in Texas and the only child to a career Air Force father and working mother. I call Colorado home but live in Southern California. I did a stint in the Navy as a Corpsman and have been a Reg. Nurse for over 27 years. I have always been an outdoor person (camping, mountaineering, rock climbing, snow skiing, etc.) and found that llamas were a very good pack animal. So in 1995 I bought my first 2 and since then not only do I go packing with them, I breed, show, train and do paravet. services to others llamas. If you watched the Rose Parade in 2007, you saw one of my llamas in the parade. Which was the very first time llamas were in the parade. Llamas are very docile and intelligent and just seem to fit who I am. I also dabble in photography.

Jen: Russ, what sparked my interest in your blog was for two reasons. One was because you said you were Buddhist. How long have you been a part of that religion?

Russ: Looking back at my life, I feel that I have always been a Buddhist. Even before I knew of such religion. Just seems that who I was growing up seemed to be more “Buddhist like” than anything else. Thoreau became a driving force while I was in high school of who I was looking to become. Buddhism and existentialism, to me, seem to go hand in hand. By reading Thoreau and learning about him, was my first exposure to Buddhism. It was not until many years later that I took up the practice of Buddhism and it has only been in the last 10-15 years that I have centered in on that practice. I am still a work in progress.

Jen: The second reason is because I noticed you said that one major reason you became Buddhist was because you had tried Christianity and as a child it was “shoved down your throat.” Would you care to elaborate on that a bit if we could ask such a personal question?

Russ: My parents were/are Methodist. I can remember in grade school always attending church and during summer going to bible school. It was a boring time for me and I revolted. It was the typical teachings, back then, of the Christian Religion of the life of Jesus and that if one did not follow, your fate was to live in hell after death. In Jr. high I was forced to go to “school” to become confirmed in the church. It was not what I wanted and felt I needed. The teachings did not seem to be who I was. In High School I was in Young Life as it was the thing to do. A social event. But what I did enjoy was debating the Bible and learning the history of the Bible. I did learn a lot and tried very hard to be worthy of “Walking with Christ”. During this time I found myself evolving and thinking about what was written and looking at how “Christians” were acting. The two never seemed to go together. Too much was the push to be “Born Again” but not to follow what I felt was the true path of what was the teachings of Jesus as it was presented in the Bible. Too much hypocrisy? I moved around from different churches searching for the way I felt being a Christian should be. I found some people trying to practice what the Bible and the way Christians should be. But in the end, they became fanatic about such and it was be this way or go away. There was too much taking the Bible literally. You HAD to be a certain way or you were not welcome. Not my idea of how you should be. The “Do as I say, not as I do” just does not sit with me.

Jen: Russ, I don’t know if you’ve heard of a new book that’s been put out recently called “Unchristian.” A large part of this book speaks about the perspective of Christians from people in the world that are not Christians. Polls and statistics show several things about how people view Christians, but the most mentioned are not known good qualities, but some pretty bad stuff. The top thing that Christians are known for are 1) being antihomosexual, 2) being hypocrits and 3) being judgmental. Do you think that is a pretty accurate view? Elaborate a little bit and tell us why you think so.

Russ: Of the people that I have met, that claim to be Christian, that seems to fit the majority. Not very forgiving. But I am sure that in any religion you will find those words being used. Too much emphasis, I feel, is placed on being “perfect Christians”. That is a hard thing to do. As a Buddhist, I know I am not perfect and surely that is a goal. But I am not put down or shunned or made to feel inferior because I am not. But I feel that many Christians and non Christians alike hang that sign on Christians. I embrace the difference in people. I don’t have to like you, or agree with you, but I can respect that you have a view different from mine. And we should be tolerant of each others religious belief and be respectful of such. But what I have seen that does not seem to be the case in the people that have said they are Christians. But I also can see that Christians might view themselves as what you say others view them as what you have listed above.

Jen: Christians are suppose to, according to their faith and what is said in the Bible, to reach out into the world and make a difference. Do you think that Christians are doing a good job of making a difference in their communities right now, or do you think we are failing? What I mean by this is like social action things like getting involved where there is a need, volunteering, getting outside the church doors and “getting their hands dirty.”

Russ: I think a lot of that is going on. But…there has been some chest thumping going on also. “See…Look at me! I am a Christian and this is what I am doing!” Quiet advertisement does not seem to be the rule of thumb, in my opinion. One should do those things because they are the right things to do and not because you belong to any type of religion. But because humans should help one another. In the recent wildland fires here in Southern California people came together as people should do. Not because it was the “Christian” thing to do, though I feel that was said in some churches, but because it was the RIGHT thing to do. I do believe the Bible does say that Christians should lead by example, but they should be humble in doing so. Instead of seeing a sign saying “This site was cleaned up by, or this home built by “The Church of ….”" How about just saying it was done by people who cared and wanted to help. If it was done by Christians, Buddhists, by the Jewish or any other group, religious or not. The word will get out. And to me, that is the best way to make a difference.Jen: Russ, how do you think Christians could change these perceptions of us - that we are antihomosexual, hypocritical, or judgmental? Do you think there is anything we can do to be better, or will we never change?

Russ: Jen, that is a loaded question! Haha! I don’t feel there will be a big change because I feel it is a human thing. There will always be small groups doing the right thing. But those will be the exception and not the rule. I know, pretty fatalistic view. But I feel it is our flaw as humans and not due to any religious teachings. You are asking for perfection, and maybe that can only be attained someplace other than here on Earth. But maybe getting the TV Evangelists off the air might help the cause. Haha!

Jen, Thank you for letting me have this opportunity to give my views. I am only a person just living my life as I see fit and doing the right thing. I don’t always succeed. I think this is a great thing to do, not just for Christians, but for people as a whole. I feel that there is a common thread in all religions. And the fundamental teachings in all religions is the same: do good, be a good person, love, be helpful, be tolerant, and be humble in spreading the faith. Peace. Russ

No, Russ - thank YOU for being so candid with us. I think many things that you said speak very loudly as to what we are supposed to do as Christians. I am trying everyday to adopt the “It’s not about me attitude.” The Bible does say, “the first shall be last, and the last shall be first.” Why do we always try to get the spotlight?Talk about it!

Wow I’m excited to announce my Time2TalkAboutIt blog has a NEW home! I’m thrilled, because now anyone can comment (not like Xanga where you had to have an xanga to comment). I’d like to see if anyone checks out my blog, so leave me a quick comment just to say hi.

I am trying to get an interview together from a Buddhist named Russ. I am hoping he’ll agree to let me ask him some questions. Lots of good exciting things to come. So stay tuned, and let’s TALK ABOUT IT!

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